By Thomas Miller
I think we’ve all seen enough Walking Dead episodes to know that when the Horde hits the fan, movement and silence are key. Resources will become scarce. There will be gas shortages. After the looting stops, almost all useful items will have been taken or inaccessible. And if we’re talking 28 Days Later Zombies, well, unless your name is Usain, you had better have reliable mobility.
But you already know this. It’s Zombie 101.
While the masses converge on car dealerships, fighting for advanced technology in a world that no longer supports it. While society crumbles to the ground, and the living dead roam the streets. While others are filling their bathtubs with water for the “Bug In,” just go ahead and toss a garbage can through our shop window and help yourself to the ultimate Zombie survival tool: A riser bar fixed gear.
Particularly, the Masi Fixed Uno Riser.
Fixed gear bikes are silent
With no coasting, or pawls in the hub for engagement, a fixed gear can pick its way through an urban death maze in virtual silence.
Fixed gear bikes have few parts and need little service
In a world were your next meal may be Street Pecans and an expired tin of sardines, simple is better. Time tested mechanical systems will get you much further than disc brakes and battery powered shifting. In fact, although the Masi Uno Fixed comes equipped with standard caliper brakes it can be run safely without brakes in fixed gear mode.
Steel bike frames are time tested and will be more durable than carbon during apocalypse conditions
There will be enough souless beasts stumbling around, so your bike shouldn’t be one. While carbon bikes are light, sterile, and ruthlessly efficient at going fast under ideal conditions, nothing about the end of the world will be ideal. A steel frame is the obvious choice when your long term survival is at stake.
An upright riding position is key
Awareness is survival. An upright riding position will give you easier access to weapons as well as allow you to scan your environment. Riser bars will help distribute the load you will undoubtedly be carrying. Quick machete access may be crucial when the going gets tough.
And that’s it. Simple. Proven. Silent.
Believe me or don’t, I already own one.